Family, Friends and Music! <3

[Soot and Stars]

Thanks to all of you here and in private who responded and wished my family well. There's a better diagnosis than the prior heart attack one. She's in critical but it's being treated like an infection. We (Mom, Grandpa & I) are supposed to be able to see her within an hour. I'm two hours from home and left straight after work. Haven't factored in sleep yet. Thanks again. Still waiting for good news.

 

[gcczep]

Recovery to wellness...

Hey Soot. My thoughts about your gran. Here's to her pulling through and sticking around for a bit.

 

[Soot and Stars]

Thank you guys so much! We've gone through a lot and I'm home for the first time since I've made that post. This forum is almost impossible with a phone so I haven't been adding updates here. You guys are like family to me so I'm going to post specifically what I've posted to my loved ones over the past couple days so you can know the journey.

Post #1 (Yesterday at 4AM)

Just got to Dartmouth and hopefully will be able to go see Grammy soon. She's believed to be out of the woods as far as a heart attack being suspect. They are treating it as an infection. Prayers or healing thoughts welcome.

(6:47AM) Thanks guys. I'm getting a little nervous as they are back to the heart inquiries. We've all tried talking to her, holding her hand and just trying to listen to the doctors. So many beeps and sounds. I can't help but tense up with the heart related talk. She's never had a bad history with anything heart related. Will have to keep waiting.

Post #2 (11:05AM)

My Grandfather has made the bravest most loving choice possible. My Grandmother is highly suspect of currently having a heart attack and surgery must be done in her shallow state to give her the best chance. Grammy please don't go. We had plans! :

Post #3 (Yesterday 5:45PM)

Grammy's not out of the woods but she made it through surgery. Not all the valves can be fixed at least not right now if at all. Others were successfully splinted. The honest truth is that the next 24 hours are going to still be a fight against the odds. My grandmother is the Muhammed Ali of grandmothers though. She's remaining strong and stable though. I'm so proud. Let's come the rest of the way Grammy.

Post #4

Woke up in the middle of the night to my Grandpas snoring and shuffling around in our hotel bed. I've pushed myself over as far as I could as I don't want to disturb what is likely the hard
est slumber he's experienced in over 60 years. I can just imagine he has certain instincts now that he's more vulnerable that he's supposed to be in his bed next to his love right now and even though he's lost consciousness from exhaustion his body and spirit just knows something's missing. He's been stronger outside of Grammy over this than anyone. The closest he's come to letting it all come out is after he made the decision for surgery decisively. He affectionately kissed his wife on the forehead and my Mom and I gripped him in the tighest triple hug ever. I lost it as well as Mom and I told him how sorry I was and he did the right thing. He said it was the only thing to do. He was welled up and said I'm so glad you two both are here. I rubbed my palm against his back reassuringly and my Mom reminded him of his sixty six year marriage miracle and how he needed to get that sixty seven. He broke my heart when he repeated at the most vulnerable I've heard his voice "She's one in a million". Never will I here the sound of love and confidence in one's life partner again anywhere near that.

Now that the exhaustion has worn off I feel scared not to focus, not to send my energy and mentally put all my mind into Grammy holding on. I feel that I've spent to long not focusing and she needs that as she's in bed I hope resting just as peacefully as I saw her and had enough energy to feed off for us to see her bedside another day and root her on. I don't want Grandpa to wake up to that empty feeling for hus remaining years. I'm sorry I drifted Grammy. I needed it but I'm with you stronger than ever now.

 

[Soot and Stars]

Just Now

I just got home for now and I'm dead tired. I would love to stay there day after day and if I had an official prognosis I would likely have a plan that leads more towards that. Still work specifically RJ who picked up for the occasion was very gracious in not even questioning my request and letting me stay where I was the next day without even having to call the store. Luckily, I only have one day to work before getting Friday off which I will very likely head up again. I pray she's conscious when i get there and it's looking that way from today. They were sedated her less and she actually coughed and jerked her shoulders in my Grandpa and I's presence. It made me nervous at first until I was reaffirmed with why it was happening all of a sudden. I'm confident my grandmothers in a good place right now so I pray it's not misplaced confidence and nothing turns around in a day. The prognosis is Grammy could be there anywhere from two weeks to months so I can't realistically put aside my life responsibilities just in case. Knowing exactly how to play this out is hard though. I seriously just want to thank you guys SO much for your support. It's overwhelming and all of you are beautiful souls who dropped any support, prayers, well wishes, kind words, bodes of confidence, healing thoughts and energy or whatever way you choose to express support for someone who may be a close friend or simply someone you know who you could see needed it. I don't take any of it for granted. I originally just wanted to have information for everyone and a place to have a stream of consciousness to catch what I'm feeling. I often find good or bad something I write may just capture one little thing or moment I'd want to salvage from this. There's nothing positive about what happened to my grandmother but it's brought my family together so close in support of each other and we took advantage of having everyone together to make every moment count. it was truly what defined quality time. Thank you everyone who's come up to be there whether it was an hour away or more. If you couldn't make it or are still coming I know many of you really wanted to be there. I love you all! <3 In closing the last piece of information is that Grammy was last seen with one of her eyes open. I can't wait for you to have both open and see the outpouring of love that all f us have for you. Even if we've just bought you time I want it to be the best investment that anyone could have in this life. Even in this tragic moment life is beautiful. It's mortality that adds the darkness but the window is opening for longer now and I hope we all just bask in the light while it's here! <3

 

[Jet]

Proverbs 3:5
Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.

Isaiah 40:31
But those who hope in the Lord
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.

1 Peter 5:7
Cast ALL you cares on Him for He cares for you.

2 Corinthians 1:3,4
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God

 

[Musikwala]

Wishing you the best of luck, Sooty, so that your grandmother pulls through.

 

[TheSound]

Sooty I obviously send you and your family my very best wishes right now. I can come on here and I read your extended, brilliantly constructed, sometimes moving, and always very musical and thoughtful threads/posts, and I’d quite happily read virtually nothing else.

 

[LG]

Missed this one...

I hope your grandmother is OK, and makes a full recovery Sooty.

Not only have I lost all my grandparents, but my Mom and Dad as well...so I know how difficult times like this can be when someone is really sick.

 

[Jet]

Missed this one...

I hope your grandmother is OK, and makes a full recovery Sooty.

Not only have I lost all my grandparents, but my Mom and Dad as well...so I know how difficult times like this can be when someone is really sick.

Same here. My mom died in 2009, and my dad died in 2011. My mom was very sick and died in hospice.

Sooty, I'm praying for you and yours.

 

[Soot and Stars]

Just thank you guys! Trying to organize my thoughts and prioritize so I can make it up there again! I was up from 3PM to 9PM the next day until getting about fours hours of sleep and waking up again. I had a decent amount of sleep before work yesterday but I'm exhausted and restless all at once now!